A Moral Dilemma
I didn't intend to have abortion play a role in my last novel, but with an organic plot it became apparent my characters would have to deal with this situation. Of course, there was no way I could remain neutral on the subject thus the story arc reflected my belief.
Today, in the United States, abortion is a divisive subject eliciting strong emotions from both proponents and opponents. I believe that one hundred years ago artificially ending a pregnancy caused the same feelings. In my third novel, Slogans: Our Children, Our Future, I broached the subject when a very young village girl became pregnant and one of my characters, Kataya, begged her sister Akulina to intervene and terminate the girl's condition.
***
“Will you do it, Lena? The child's desperate.”
Akulina stepped back from her sister and crossed herself. “I cannot. What you ask is black art. It's forbidden.”
“Lena, it's no longer forbidden. Several in my battalion had one. The government no longer has laws against it.”
“I'm not talking about your government, Kataya. I'm speaking of God and He forbids killing the unborn.”
“Your god forbids?” Kataya moved closer hammering words as a boxer does his blows. “Look around Lena. If your god should forbid anything it's children being born into this place so they can die before their first summer. Is that what your god wants, another Luka?”
* * *
From this dialog one quickly grasps the opposing perspectives of the two sisters. Kataya, the younger sister has a secular view of the procedure, while Akulina adheres to teachings of their faith seeing abortion as the ultimate sin. Kataya's reference to the untimely death of Akulina's son, Luka, is a low blow meant to cause a rift between Akulina and her God.
Later Akulina reflects on the problem no longer seeing the issue in black and white, but rather shades of gray. As her mind grapples with the subject, both alternatives vie with multiple arguments causing Akulina to eventually seek divine guidance.
* * *
That night, the izbah was quiet, too quiet. Akulina lay awake staring at the ceiling and listening to a far off howl. She tried to blank her mind, but only succeeded in recalling events best forgotten. She remembered her mother's oath to use the potion only to save life and the anguish her mother felt when two women she denied help died in childbirth. But what of the four who pleaded to end their pregnancy but bore children they loved? And what of those who visited and then mysteriously miscarried?
Finally, Akulina rose and guided by the candle's glow went and knelt before the ikon of Jesus the Protector. In her own Gethsemane she prayed for direction, but she knew she had already chosen her path.
* * *
Akulina reaches her decision and performs the unthinkable. I wrote the following scene without explicitly identifying Akulina. By this I intended to show Akulina looked upon the act as an out of body experience thus removing herself as far away as possible.
* * *
Five days later, as harbingers of heavy snow scudded across the moon's brilliance, a figure cloaked in black slunk through Unkurda toward the Staroverok burial ground. In its left hand it carried a mattock and in the crook of its right arm was a small white bundle. The figure scurried from shadow to shadow and avoided places where the moonlight betrayed it. Upon reaching the cemetery it paused and scanned the plots before moving toward the murdered holy man’s grave. Once there it lowered the bundle and began to scoop away the snow to reveal the earth below.
***
Akulina tried to salve her conscience by baptizing the baby and burying her in consecrated ground, but her actions gnawed at her until the fall harvest. Among the citizens conscripted to help the villagers in the harvest was a priest. During his free time, the he performed many religious functions including confession. Akulina went to him for absolution, not knowing whether it would be granted or not.
***
The tearful woman who sat opposite him was old before her age. Her face, which once may have graced a portrait, now reflected the deep furrows etched by cold winters and hot summers. The skin beneath her eyes were darkened and sagged by sadness, and yet her blue orbs still retained the sparkle of life. In a trembling voice she poured out her story of her sin and begged for forgiveness. It was a story that once may have repulsed the good priest and forced him to deny absolution. But that was once.
* * *
At first the priest wanted to turn Akulina away, but after much soul searching he agreed to offer her the sacrament.
* * *
The woman grabbed the priest's sleeve. “Father you must forgive me. I will do whatever penance you wish. Anything. Please.”
“Mother, it is not for me to forgive you for Christ Jesus has already forgiven you. Do you think He suffered just for those who commit minor sins? No, my dear woman. He shed his blood and poured out His grace for everyone. Especially for you.”
The woman dropped her head into her hands and wept.
“Do not cry, for your sins are forgiven. And as for penance, I believe you have suffered enough.”
* * *
From these scenes I hoped to show abortion is not something to be taken lightly. Like Akulina, I believe there is just too much gray in terminating a pregnancy to be subjected to the absolute whims or deep thoughts of anyone.
